I Caught Fire

Hey Guys what can I other than I AM A WHORE!!!! *laughs* That's all I am saying because yeah certain other reasons ... being my dignity and other things. I can't make you lot understand unless if you were in close circles with me and you know what's going on with me.

Things have been good been accepted by more uni's and I go back to college (about time)on monday. I know that a couple people will be glad to have me back such as Jaz, the other corinne and Alex. I had Jaz calling me up in surprise about stuff on our date.

About the whole dignity and losing it (and no I am not using dignity as a cheap version of virginity) its just something I did that makes me feel low about myself, but ahwell what do you guys care.

Um well what can I say excpet I have finally seen my brother he is alright minus the kiddie fiddlers in his block in the prison. Um I'm tired... That bitch that slapped around the face with a book is trying to getting me kicked out. They actually said to me today "corinne you know if the people start thinking that you are causing an uproar at college then we will ahve to tell you to leave" I was like you try you fucking styupid twats. Pre-eminent is coming down this weekend, which consists of Vic, cat, David, Blaine (fucking wicked drummer) and myself are just gonna mess around with our musical instruments and see what we can get going. Not that this thing is my whole idea, I just gave the name that's all.

well I actually wrote a poem, a really bad one at that but I thought I might just put it up on here for the sake of it.. because it kinda goes with the entry so ....

Not you, NotI

He plays on my mind
Encourages
Gives speed
To the love that lay "dormant"
Under all the arteries and the organs
That succumb to his mental presence.
I think of him
while I pull at the puppet strings of another.
His leaves his stench
Not the one I am used to.
The eyes I stare down into
These filled to their lustful content
Missing eyes of emotion
and love
That used to stare
and trace my very features
In appreciation.

The understudy lays soft touches over my skin
Getting pleasure
Holding on to us and what we were
Feeling out memories
Stored for the longterm.
Fulled, out of it intoxicated
"you are not the one I want"
Cries silently inside
While outside moans
Like a cat on heat
Urge this guys continuation.

Not you I want
But I'll make do
A whore when sober
Regrets forever
Not Fuelled.
In my mind you destroy
and make me do this act.
The guy moan as I think "shut up"
You spoil the day dream in this mind
Not you here
you replace another
Not I.

"He was stupid to let you go"
His name it freezes me.
Need to get you out of my mind
Like through this sexual merge
He can fork around with memories
While he is getting his
Full entertainment like a sitcom unwound.
Not worthy to touch them
His hands should burn
Placing them where his used to go
Feeling out the grooves he left.
Cheating
Infidelity
These words cover my brain
Litarly I do no wrong
For this mind is to blame.

Not you I want
But I'll make do
A whore when sober
Regrets forever
Not Fuelled.
There in body
But not in my mind
I yearn for you
It hurts so bad to realise
Not you here
You replace another
Not I.